Dear Grandma

February 12, 2007

Anouther Year

Filed under: Uncategorized — sassy @ 2:21 am


Dear Grandma,

Again this year I wanted a bunch of flowers for Valentines Day, but for yet anouther year not only am I not getting yelled at but I know for sure I will not get flowers on the 14th.

After 14 years of marriage my husband still does not really trust that I love him and him alone. For at least two hours today he yelled at me. You know me Grandma I yelled back. I turned it into a conversation. I stood my ground. I defended my love and devotion for him and him alone for my whole adult life, but he went on saying horrible things and yellin at me. I kept a stright face and did not break down in to tears and sobbing until I was alone in my laundry room. I still feel like crying right now. Why do I feel like telling you will somehow make it better?  I miss the way you comforted me.  I need you to comfort me now.  Grandma I am a loving honorable wife to him, and I desire to alwasy be a loving devoted wife to him.  I need him to be close to me and to let me heal from the grief of your loss.  I really an not handle his misdirected rage right now.  Grandma I love him and I need him and I feel so so very alone and scared. I called my Mom but she did not seem to have any answers like you did. She tried to understand but she see things diffrent than you and I did.

Grandma I am a crying mess right now.

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